Breastfeeding: more than bonding

Ma shaAllah a have a child who I remember nursing until I almost shrank back down to my pre-martial size. At the time, I thought that it would never end but was pleased with the temperment it resulted. For the first time I had a calmer, more confident and happier toddler. Even today, I can calm them down with a smile or forehead to forehead nuzzle. These days I am noticing something more. In every successive stage, this child is welcoming me into their play and aha moments. How strange it is to me that breastfeeding is simply viewed as 'good food' when it is so much more. It is a vehicle of interpersonal communication that transcends human comprehension. We have words...we have skin... we have breath. All are means of transmitting parts of who we are and validating who our children are.

As muslims we are limited to two years of breastfeeding. Although I think thirty months is the absolute limit if it is difficult for the child. In my experience, the longer you nurse/ (nurture their emotional state in infancy) the more confident and courageous they become when they are older. But even if you stop breastfeeding at thirty months, continue the communication with eyes, skin and breath. Words are sometimes bereft of softening a heart or changing it. But a motherly nuzzle and remembrance of your special time past is very effective at heart changing even in the most obstinate preteen.


In these last ten days, now seven, of Ramadan re-establish that bond with your child. Forgive, forget move on and rekindle the attachment. Share something of yourself and something of your bond with your Lord with your child. In sha Allah you can build a bond for them with Him.